Everything was harder for me than it was for my neurotypical peers, but I kept holding myself to the same, if not higher, standards.Īt my lowest, I was suicidal, having weekly breakdowns, and battling an eating disorder. I didn’t recognize it at the time, but I had executive dysfunction that was exacerbated by my mood disorder. I couldn’t - I didn’t hang out with anyone and showered twice a week at best. They could juggle school, extracurriculars, a social life, and self-care. They socialized effortlessly and made friends. I was essentially abandoned by my school, and also began noticing stark contrasts between my classmates and me. I couldn’t rely on my intrinsic abilities anymore. I had never learned to persevere or withstand academic failure, but suddenly I had no choice. I clung to the gifted label yet felt like I was wasting my potential. I grew up making straight As without studying, but I couldn’t skate through anymore. School had grown harder, but my gifted support had ended in fifth grade I was left to fend for myself. I took the other route: I kept up my high academic performance but also developed severe anxiety and depression from the pressures I felt thanks to my gifted label and the lack of support for my autism.īy my sophomore year of high school, I was burnt out. They are then predictably but unhelpfully told they need to apply themselves that they have so much potential. Some children may become withdrawn - school becomes overwhelming, so they stop trying. If I Couldn’t Have Friends, I Would Have a Perfect GPAĢe children need specific support, but because of their seemingly contradictory conditions, they don’t always receive it. My parents, teachers, and even my therapist simply saw me as a weird gifted kid. 2e wasn’t in the academic vernacular when I was a kid. Today, the term twice exceptional (2e) has become popular in parenting and educational circles to describe gifted children who also have autism, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), learning differences, or other similar conditions. I am twice exceptional - basically a neurodivergent gifted student. I am also autistic, though I remained undiagnosed until my senior year of high school - in part because my giftedness masked or distracted attention away from my autism. Unfortunately, my giftedness didn’t come alone. Challenge days were the only days I looked forward to school. At age 6, I began participating in my school’s Challenge program, where gifted students were pulled out of class once a week to engage in a curriculum that focused on critical thinking and self-directed learning. I was identified as gifted in kindergarten. Especially if you’re also neurodivergent. I’ll say it: Being gifted isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
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